Friday, January 12, 2018

See you again my friend....


I recently lost my long life best friend to an addiction that caused her health to deteriorate and eventually took her life. In the last few years she and I had a bit of a rocky relationship as I thought if I gave her some tough love she would realize the one person who has always had her back, always forgave her for her mistakes and always told her the truth regardless if she liked it or not; that she would snap out of it and get her shit together. But, she didn't.
We've known each other since we were just babies, our parents were friends and I didn't like that girl one bit. I was passive and very shy. She was aggressive and loud.
I use to dread when her Daddy would bring her with him when he hung out with my parents.
.When I was around 14 years old her father brought her over, I hadn't seen her in awhile and she changed, she wasn't as personal space invading as previous visits, she had a blue raspberry slushie and a pack of zebra Fruit strip gum. She reached out the pk of gum to me and said "want some zebra stripped gum? it's really good"..... and in that moment we became sisters.
From that moment on we were inseparable ..literally. 
She was everything I wasn't and I was everything she wasn't. I was her calm and she was my storm. People would be shocked to see one without the other. I remember people always saying if you see Sharon you'll see Shelbi and vice versa...She called me every birthday to sing to me, She's been known to make death threats to people she thought were trying to steal her best friend from her, anytime I call she would jump to get to me when I needed her, she loved me a lot and I her. We made so so so many memories and I'm thankful for every single drama filled one. Life was never boring with her, actually it was a little to exciting at times. As we got older and started our own families we were still very close but went down different paths. The last 2 to 3 years were very hard for us both. That damn addiction caught her..... the same damn addiction that took my Daddy. I just wanted her to get better. I really thought that of all the people I know.... SHE could beat it after watching Mom beat it.. She looked up to my Mom, my Mom was her Mom... Shelbi was very embarrassed about her drinking and she would be so mad at me right now for blabbing about it BUT I want who ever is reading this to know how much addiction has destroyed lives. It took my Daddy and now my life long best friend... It left 3 awesome kids without their mother.. I fking miss her. I just wanna call her and make a "plan" and hear her silly singing and over dramatic gossip.. 
I miss pre-addiction Shelbi.
R.I.P friend



Monday, August 28, 2017

I feel NAKED....

Some day's I think about taking every single pill I have to sleep and never wake up.
Some day's I love life and couldn't imagine missing out on the blessings I've been given.
Some day's I'm hell on wheels spitting fire in need of holy water.
Some day's I find peace and calm in everything.
You may be shocked by that first line but mental illness is real.

Having a mental illness is something I've always dealt with as far back as I can remember. I just didn't know what to call it. When I was 14 I attempted to slit my wrists but my Mother, she saved me. Thank you, Momma! For years the doctors have been throwing me on the newest depression medication just hoping it will work to shut me up. When my shrink lady first told me I was bi-polar among my other issues I kinda already knew and she threw me on some more pills which started to work... But, that didn't last long. It never does. I can't even remember how many medications I've been on to be honest. Every 6 months to a year my doctors switch my medications up.
I guess when you're on a million different types of medications daily they have to figure out what can go with what ect, so they don't defeat the purpose and kill you LOL

Doctors and medication are no strangers to me. I spent my first birthday in a hospital room hooked up to machines. I was always sick then too, my immune system is an ass hole. I have memory issues, I'm on the road to full blown dementia. I'm not prepared but I'm trying to be(I still have many many years). When I was 6 or 7 I was diagnosed with short term memory loss, social anxiety aka learning disability and a social reject. I'm sure you can imagine how that went growing up. I've spent every waking moment fighting for my life in some way, shape or form since the moment I was born. It only got worse as I grew up. I deal with constant pain in every cell of my body thanks to fibromyalgia 
and a small case of leg length discrepancy which is one thing among others that has lead to my weight being out of control.. when I tell you it hurts to move my ass ***IT HURTS TO MOVE MY ASS***..... literally horrific pain most days and on the days I'm actually able to be pushed to move more then normal, it takes at least 3 days to recover... My stomach is eaten with ulcers and add the IBS to the gastric mix... it's pretty much FML...haha

But, the extreme social anxiety and manic depression hurt even more then any physical pain ever could. There are days when I get so deep down in the thickness of sorrow I feel like I'm drowning, gasping for air, clinging on to my life and I don't know why? Nothing that I recall really triggers it. It just comes in like a sneaky snake and grabs me pulling me in every direction.. I literally have to fight my own mind But as you can see I'm still here WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER LOL

When I was 12yr old my Granny Sharon passed away(she was more like a mother to me since my momma was so young) not to long after I was sexually assaulted the first time(I have yet to talk about that here with you). Then my Daddy left our family for another... I think those 3 events took place with in a years time. Grew up learning to heal, always learning to heal...
I lost my Daddy all over again to suicide in 06' if you never read his story you can here I remember... I refuse to do that to my daughters, I will fight this fight every single day, I am my daughters protector and they need me.
My first and only son died in 2010 his story can be found here Junior's Story.
2013 my marriage ended.

On social media's I may seem like one of those typical braggarting, smiling all the time asshole mom's who post to much and talk in comments to much and to often but in reality land I'm awkward and hard to get to know. I wont really talk to you much and you most likely wont talk to me because of my bitch face and defensive stance. The whole time in my head I'm screaming "I WANT TO GO HOME" while searching for the nearest exit and coming up with a good excuse to leave the situation because I just know you are all making fun of me secretly and judging me and some of you might actually want to physically harm me. I also have times where I cause myself to become angry and snap. I start yelling and making a fool of myself.... But I guess that's what comes with being bipolar, you never know how your going to feel or act from one second to the next...Ridiculous right? Yup.. But that's what happens when I leave the house, I have to be pumped up and motivated (or dragged whatever LOL) to do so.

The last couple years have been a little easier for me as my daughters and my best friend Shi motivate me. But it's still a huge struggle I deal with.
With that being said. I have not posted on my blog site in over 4 years. 5 years ago my marriage ended. The life I knew was over and our family was devastated. It took me some time to get where I am now. No it did not take me 5 years to get over my ex husband but it took a few years to get over the fact the life I struggled to create was not going to be my life. We have not seen my ex husband/father of the girls in 5 years, I solely take care of these girls physically and financially. Some may wonder if I will post a lot of ranting blogs about him and his absence and him not helping financially but I can assure you I rarely talk about him at this point but I know some of you are wondering what happen with our marriage, so I'm sure we will go there LOL The only thing I ever do mention is that I wish a birthday card was sent to the girls from him at the very least.   In the last 5 years I had a chance to do a little growing(still have lots more to do) I had some time to discover things that I as a person enjoy and now I'm back here, hoping you will join me in my new epic journey of discovering more about myself.. I'm now a single mother raising two amazing daughters with the help of my family and my best friend.

So yeah that's a little information I would like to share with you all to start with so you can have a glimpse of what I may talk about. I also do product reviews, giveaways, crafting posts, make up related posts, gaming posts I love MMO'S and more <3

I did this little "about you" thingy so I figure I should just copy and paste it here for a quick sum up of information above LOL


First thing you need to know, I'm Bi-polar as shit.

I'm ADD as it gets, I'm a gamer, one of those wonky crafty people and a Mom.
 

The name is Sharon in RL, but I go by Shay as well.


Do I have any super powers?


My brain is mush and I have sloth like abilities.

Instead of one foot dragging, I drag ass, haha.

I hate to do ANYTHING, dishes they can wait, vacuum maybe next month, dust forget about it!


Young at heart, or an old soul?


I'm a tortured soul!


Memorable highlight, just off the top of my head?


My littlest one shit glitter, which was frickin' spectacular, cause I think she may have caught my awesomeness!


How long have you been blogging?

A couple years.  I'm  not an expert blogger BUT I've done pretty well in my opinion :)
Got an award for some Parenting Blog of the Year thingy once as well as being a rank 2 with Google within my first 6 months and partnered with companies such as Sony, Nickelodeon, AT&T and more!


Where do you live?
Florida.


Age?

30ish something.


Hair color?
I have hair awesomeness issues, I change it often so it depends on what month it is..


Eye color? 

Blue/Green and BIG!


Height?5,9 "My you're a tall one" :)


Weight?
 

Pft...   /cast Smite Smite Smite.....( If you don't know I'm a big time World of Warcraft gamer, I main a Priest) :)


Date of birth?

JULY the bestest month ever :)


Star sign?
I'm a Cancer bitches!!


Fav color?
 Duh, PURPLE :)

 Hobbies? 
YES, I'm a Gamer, Crafter, Play mate(for my girls LOL) and A SELFIE TAKER :)


This post is really really long so I'm gonna end it for now if there is anything else you wanna know about me, feel free to ask :)
 



                                                             









Friday, April 5, 2013

Gracie is ONE!!!!

Happy Birthday, Gracie Girl!!!

Just can't believe my little girl is ONE, It's seems as though I just gave birth to her yesterday!
Please slow your growing down, it's all happening way to fast.
I'm going to be the mother suffering from empty nest syndrome so dramatically everyone will feel my pain, until then I'm going to soak up every second of your childhood. I love being your Mommy, I'm blessed to be your Mommy and so VERY proud to be your Mommy!!
My beautiful Rainbow baby!!
 Newborn Gracie

One year old Gracie!

Oh, the tears of every emotion.


Here is a little video of us singing Happy Birthday!

 We decided to get a virus a week before the party, I literally had 2 days to get everything ready for the party of which I had decided(before we got sick)to get all Pinterestie and do it myself everything.
The Cup cakes actually turned out better then I thought they would with my tired shaky hands. They tasted oh so yummy and super moist! My house is still covered in every shade of neon glitter you can think of, I don't really mind I LOVE sparkles!
 I got these cute little pots at the Dollar Tree, 3 for a dollar(awesome right) and the little spin wheels also. Painted a rainbow on it and threw some dirty in the pot, trimmed the spin wheel and bam cute little side decor. I made the rainbow banner out of poster boards, paint and loads of glitter.
I bought a helium tank from Walmart for around 25 bucks(there was no way in hell i was stuffing a million balloons in the car and then try to get home with out dieing. NO, thank you!) I bought a crap ton of water balloons and made a rainbow arch for the entrance(boy did those balloon smell funky though LOL) I got a BUBBLE MACHINE so there would be bubbles just flying around, which was more annoying then i had thought but VERY cute, plus the girls can use it to play with when there having outside pool time. I bought a bunch of big bright neon rainbow spin wheels for the yard, so we put them all around the pool VERY cute! My Mom use to make "Rainbow Punch"  for my siblings and i when we were little, so i thought it only appropriate for Gracie's Rainbow party! So SHE made it! If you ask nicely she may be incline to give the recipe!
My sister Stacey on the left and my Mom in the middle where so helpful with all the party preparations! I just can't thank them enough for everything, I really do have a great family, I feel so very lucky for all the support they give me and my family! The only thing that would have made this day perfect would have been for Gracie to have her Daddy here.
Gracie was so scared of this Doggy walk n' ride toy she got, poor thing!
BUT, now she LOVES him. 
Look at Miss Gracie GO GO GO!! 
Love it!

To see more photos of Gracie's party click HERE!

Katie and Gracie partied so hard that, when it became silent i looked over and they both were snuggled up on the couch together passed out!! I tried to get a shot of them but just my luck the camera died before i could.

It was a GREAT day!


(Kisses from the girls)
xox

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

GiveAway Winners!

Congratulation!


Stacie D. You have won the Kidz Can Design GiveAway!

 Ren Mei. You have won the Splash N' Boots DVD/CD GiveAway!

Kelly L. You have won the Simple Addictions GiveAway!


You ladies have 24 hours to claim your prize or another winner will be chosen via Random.Org!

Lil'Bob's by Sketchers Review/GiveAway!!




The generous people over at SKECHERS sent us these beautiful Girls' Bobs World - Sparkle Fixx
for Kat and she absolutely LOVES them, She LOVED them even more when I told her about the Bob's from SKECHERS program that donated shoe's to in need, deserving children! 

At SKECHERS, every season is the season of giving. Through the BOBS from SKECHERS program, SKECHERS has donated more than 3 million pairs of new shoes to underprivileged children in the U.S. and around the world.


BOBS from SKECHERS donates a new pair of shoes to a child in need with every purchase. Plus, BOBS are a fashionable and comfortable shoes that are perfect for the spring season.


Inspired by the idea of gifting a pair with every purchase, we created the BOBS collection to help children worldwide. We're proud to be part of a movement that's already donated more than three million pairs of shoes to children in the U.S. and more than 25 countries around the world and we look forward to donating millions more with your help.

Globally minded down to its earth-friendly packaging, BOBS is designed with comfort, style and care in mind. And for every pair of BOBS that you buy, SKECHERS will give a new pair of shoes to a child in need.


Mommy Approved!

 We are give away one pair of Lil'Bob's from SKETCHERS to one of our fabulous readers!
Easy entry through the Rafflecopter below!
Good Luck!


                                                                    

 {Thank you to SKETCHERS for their product for review! This product was given for review for my honest opinion. No other compensation was received for the review.}

Free Country Review/GiveAway!

I was contacted by the lovely reps for Free Country to review something off their product line of my choice and to giveaway a 100.00$ Gift Card for their online store! I went to their website and found some pretty amazing stuff, I will say that there is not much for the plus size ladies out there, I was getting a little discouraged trying to find something that would fit me, just when I was going to say forget it and get something for my 7 year old I found this beautiful winter coat in just my size!!! I was ecstatic, with the big move coming soon from Florida to Nebraska  I definitely will be needing this come winter again! When my winter coat arrived I was nerves that it may not fit right or be uncomfortable with heavy weigh down, but I was so wrong. 
This coat is heaven to touch and pretty light weight for the warmth it gives!

If you are interested in the Zephyr Power Down Series Jacket here is a little more information on it-
 The Zephyr coat from Free Country's Power Down Series mixes box and micro quilting for an overall slimming effect in Airtouch down shell. Adjustable side tabs enhance the shapely style. Down fill with detachable, faux fur trim hood and double zip, front closure with signature Airtouch bib, butter pile back lining, collar, and hand gaiter make Zephyr super warm. Interior cell phone, music, and basket pockets add utility.


 I absolutely LOVE my new winter coat!
Mommy Approved!

Not only does Free County offer winter apparel but they have a great line of Swim Suits just in time for Summer shopping, which can be found HERE.

To purchase from Free Country click HERE.

To win a 100.00$ Gift Card to Free Country enter through the easy Rafflecopter!

Good Luck!

 



 {Thank you to Free Country for their product for review! This product was given for review for my honest opinion. No other compensation was received for the review.}

Burp Gear- The Fashionable & Functional Burp Cloth Review/GiveAway!!



I was recently contact by the COO of Renvoi Bebe to review the new Fashionable & Functional Burp Cloth, But as you all know My little one is now ONE years old so i decided to recruit a few review team members! I chose Stephanie D to review this product as she just gave birth to a handsome baby boy!

What is the Burp Gear? 

Burp Gear is the Fashionable & Functional burp cloth. Some of the features that make BurpGear totally different from your traditional burp cloth is that it is leak resistant, covers both shoulders, is adjustable for different body frames and it easily folds into a small clutch for easy transport. In between uses, you can just toss it into the washing machine for easy cleaning - what mom needs another thing to dry clean? The fabric is incredibly soft and comfortable for babies and we’re really proud of how this product makes a mom’s job much easier.



 

Here is what Stephanie D had to say-

This burp cloth is a great idea & works great! The only problem that I have is it didn't really absorb the spit up very well. However, the design is very pretty & eye catching. It's in a convenient pouch & you can store it easily or have in your vehicle. I really enjoyed using it!

Mommy Approved!

To purchase your very own Burp Gear Fashionable & Functional Burp Cloth click HERE!

Hungry for that Something and Burp Gear have teamed up to give one of our awesome readers the chance to WIN one Burp Gear Fashionable & Functional Burp Cloth!!
Easy entry through the Rafflecopter below!
Good Luck!

 {Thank you to Burp Gear for their product for review! This product was given for review for my honest opinion. No other compensation was received for the review.}

TootScoot Balance Bike Review/GiveAway!

 The awesome people over at TootScoot sent me this rad AWARD WINNING balance bike!
Although Gracie is not quite old enough or tall enough with her shortly McShort legs, soon she will be and I'm pretty excited to have this little gem waiting for her to ride! Katie our 7 year old on the other hand has put some miles on it showing Gracie just how awesome it is. 

We received the white TootScoot which happens to come with black stickers and pink stickers for boy or girl. The black stickers are already on the frame which you can be easily removed and replaced with the pink. The TootScoot balance bike is easy to put together, my 7 year old and I got it all put together in about 15 minutes tops, it comes with all the tools you need too!

The TootScoot comes in 4 colors, White, Red, Black & Blue!






The TootScoot is a balance bike intended for children ages 2-5. It was created with no pedals or training wheels. Children sit on the seat while pushing off the ground with their feet, scooting themselves and the bike forward. By first learning balance, coordination and motor skills on the TootScoot, children as well as parents will find the transition to a traditional two wheel bike much easier than without a TootScoot.





 The TootScoot weighs approximately seven pounds and is constructed of steel tubing. There are chrome accents on the bike and round, rubber cushioned handle bar grips. The rubber helps to prevent scratching walls and protects the TootScoot when dropped. The wheels are made out of a durable plastic rubber material which means no need to fill tires with air. Also, the TootScoot has wider than normal wheels, making it easier for a child to balance on the bike. The handle bar and seat are both adjustable

The original TootScoot Balance Bike was created by Buck Hale for his one-year-old son as a Christmas gift. Buck rides BMX bikes as well as races motocross and wanted to see his son on a bike as soon as he could. Seth, Bucks son, soon started associating himself with the bike, playing with the wheels and pushing around on the bike. At only 18 months, Seth could ride and balance with his feet off the ground. Not long after this Seth was a pro, whizzing around and constantly stealing attention at every park they went to. According to Buck, watching your child ride so well at such a young age “is the equivalent of watching your child walk for the first time.”

With friends and passer bys constantly asking Buck where they could find a TootScoot for their child, or if he would make them one, he decided that this could be a successful product to sell. Having always had the idea in the back of his mind, Buck contacted some manufacturers and producers and began the process of the TootScoot. After nine months of going back and forth with the manufacturer with drawings and prototypes, the TootScoot was finally born.

 To purchase your own TootScoot Balance Bike Click HERE.

or

Wanna WIN your very own White TootScoot Balance Bike?

We teamed up with TootScoot to bring you this awesome GiveAway!

 {Thank you to TootScoot for their product for review! This product was given for review for my honest opinion. No other compensation was received for the review.}

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Snakes, Gators, Bears Oh My!!!!

I haven't posted in awhile. But, I'm working on an update post! Been very busy with Gracie's party plans! But, until then here are a few goofy photos.
When Stuffed Animals Attack!













                                                                              LOL
Rainy inside day!
Thank heaven for imaginations!


(Kisses from the girls)
xox

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Kidz Can Design Jewelry Review & GiveAway!!!

I recently partnered up with Kidz Can Design to bring you this awesome GiveAway!
Kids Can Design specializes in converting your child’s work of art into a high quality sterling silver custom piece of jewelry. You can use any traditional drawings created on a piece of paper, or an image of your choice which then can be turned in to either a Pendant or Charm to cherish forever!

How frickin' awesome is that? I was so excited and apprehensive when my package arrived. Because i knew what was inside, Instead of having Katie or Gracie's drawling converted, I choose to have the only masterpiece i will ever have of my sweet Angel baby Trent Junior's, his hand print!!!!!!!!!!!!
When I open the little silver box to see his tiny hand print converted into a beautiful charm, I couldn't hold back the tears!! It's amazing and will be forever cherished!





Mommy Approved!
I highly recommend this company, easy to order and such awesome friendly staff!

Who wants to win their very own personalize design from Kidz Can Design?? We will be giving one of awesome readers the chance to design their very own charm!!


Good luck!!



 {Thank you to Kidz Can Design for their product for review! This product was given for review for my honest opinion. No other compensation was received for the review.}

Friday, March 8, 2013

DoodleHugs Review!

I'm soooo excited to tell you about this wonderful company called DoodleHugs!
I was contacted by the owner and crafter of these awesome huggable creations, Karon.
Here is a little awesomeness about Karon.

Hi I'm Karon...

Your child's artwork is my inspiration to craft a soft, huggable toy. I will reproduce the design as close as possible using colorful soft fabrics. These custom made soft toys are one of a kind.

I have been a crafter for over 30 years. My hobbies are crafting, sewing and crocheting - usually with my own designs. My craft designs have been featured in national publications.

I have made numerous toys for children and I love seeing them smile with that first big hug.


All DoodleHugs are proudly made in the USA.
If you have any questions or special requests please contact Karon at Karon@doodlehugs.com


How much does it cost?
Prices start at $65 and up, depending on complexity and details in the child’s drawing along with the size of the soft toy. Please email Karon at Karon@doodlehugs.com and attach a copy of the child's drawing for a quote or use the Request a Quote Form. Shipping charges (postage and handling) are $10 for U.S. destinations. For international destinations, a shipping quote will be supplied.

How big is the soft toy?
Usually around 12 to 20 inches wide or long.

How do I send the drawing to you?
You can upload an image of the drawing (jpg, gif, pdf files only) in the Request a Quote Form or you can send it as an attachment to Karon@doodlehugs.com.

How long will it take?
From two to six weeks after payment is processed. Rush orders are possible, but there will be an additional cost which will be quote for you.

What are the toys made of?
A wide range of fabrics that include cotton solids and prints, fleece, felt, flannels, other embellishments, etc. The toys are stuffed with new, hypoallergenic 100% polyester fiberfill. Not intended for children under 3.

What if I’m not happy with the DoodleHug?
Refunds are not provided as these are custom designed one-of-a-kind items. However, once you receive the DoodleHug, if there is a problem, you are welcome to contact Karon and she will try to make adjustments. Additional charges may apply.

Can I specify the fabrics I want or can I send you some fabric (an old favorite piece of clothing or blanket) to be used in the soft toy?
Sure, if it is a fabric she thinks work with, Karon will be happy to incorporate it.

Do you have examples of DoodleHugs?
Please view Karon's gallery by clicking here.


 My Opinion-
I think this idea is so frickin' AWESOME! I am artistic and I can proudly say that I handed down the art gene to Kat! She and I are always doodling or crafting. I still have art work from my youth, I knew I kept them for a reason, to show her where she got her talent from! Ok, we may not be the best artists in the world but, to us we are frickin'  Leonardo da Vinci's LOL
The night I got the email from Karon and showed Kat, she was like a little printing press at the kitchen table with her art pad and crayons.

Katie's current fascination
Zombie girl
(From the mind of Katie)

Kat had a very hard time choosing which one to have Karon make for her.
I told her to go with what is fun and exciting!
So she choose the Zombie girl!!
Which was a fabulous choice! Zombie girl is so adorable(I love the mind of my Kat) She has such a wonderful imagination!

Here is the finished product!!

Kat Loves her Zombie girl!!








We are so very impressed with the details and craftsmanship, if you notice on the photos Karon even made the bite chunk from Zombie girls side, Karon is amazing!
I highly recommend checking her website out and bringing your children's art to life!!





(Kisses from the girls)
xox

 {Thank you to Karon @ DoodleHugs for their product for review! This product was given for review for my honest opinion. No other compensation was received for the review.}

See you again my friend....

I recently lost my long life best friend to an addiction that caused her health to deteriorate and eventually took her life. In the las...